Isn’t amazing how there are some people in your life that no matter how long it has been since you last saw them, it only feels like yesterday?
I’ve had the pleasure of spending my weekend with just such friends. The time was short, but sweet.
I encourage anyone reading this to cultivate such friendships. They enrich life.
When I think of the friends I have, I know I’ve been blessed.
I read the following quote on Jeff Moore’s Everyday Power Blog. The article contained much more information, but this quote is the one that stood out for me.
“Don’t make a habit out of choosing what feels good over what’s actually good for you.” - Eric Thomas
How many times do we get caught up in our culture or lives making decisions simply based upon what ‘feels good’?
Do we even spend time thinking about ‘what is actually good for us’?
I know this last year as I’ve jumped off the ‘busy’ train and started to be more conscious about how I spend my time I’ve given thought to how growing more and more into the image of Christ should be lived out.
Do you ever think about these things and if so, how do you put it into practice?
Being a ‘mom’ is not always easy!
There are many different types of moms and different stages of mothering. Some are easy and fun though may be tiring. Others may cause sleepless nights and worry. Then there is the stage of being a mother to adult children. Even this time offers different emotions, joys, rewards and challenges. Today I’m focusing on the challenges and some of the lessons I’ve had to learn along the way. I’ve given birth to three very strong willed daughters. I have four equally strong willed adult stepchildren. I prefer to think of them all as my children because even if you have not given birth to them, you invest in them, love them and want what is best for them. That is what being a mom is all about!
As the ‘mom’ of adult children, I’ve had to learn they’re all individual adults with ideas, goals, priorities and plans of their own. It can be highly rewarding to watch them strive for something and find their success. On those days, I get to celebrate with them.
On days when they contact me to just chat or call for my opinion or advise, I get to share in this unique adult to adult bonding and there is little else to compare with the joy this offers.
Then there are the days when I recognized I can only watch as one or another of them struggles with aspects of life, sometimes over and over again. It hurts my heart to watch these struggles. I’ve already learned my life experiences are not viewed with any value; thus any words of advice I might offer fall on deaf ears. I’m left with few options. I’m trying to learn, sharing my opinion or advice at times like this only leaves me frustrated. We’ve each matured to the point where these discussions are not heated, but I know I’ve hit a wall and it would be better if I didn’t try. My heart breaks as I watch the same life lesson being presented over and over again with the same outcome. Didn’t some one once say, “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, expecting different results?” As a mom, hardening my heart and turning away is not an option for me. Nor is focusing on one relationship so much as to allow it to rob me of the joy in other relationships.
Being a mom is not always easy! There are always plenty of reasons to be on my knees. I know sometimes praying is all I can do!
Could we make the world a little better if we thought of others and spoke of them in the following way?
Today someone asked me if I liked you. I laughed, and I said, “Ha! That’s funny!! I absolutely LOVE that woman!! She’s funny, caring, crazy as heck, sweet, beautiful, she’s reading this right now & I love her!!”
Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning the devil says, “Oh Crap, She’s up!”
“You don’t have a soul. You are a soul. You have a body.” -C.S. Lewis
This is another message I have received from several sources. It made me feel good and smile. I share it, hoping the ideas might motivate you to think about how you speak of others.
I can’t take credit for writing this and unfortunately, I don’t know whom to credit. It was sent to me via email and had been forwarded many times. I hope you will ponder the message and see if it applies to you.
A young lady confidently walked around the room while leading and explaining stress management to an audience with a raised glass of water. Everyone knew she was going to ask the ultimate question, “Half empty or half full?” She fooled them all. “How heavy is this glass of water?” she inquired with a smile. Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. to 20 oz.
She replied, “The absolute weight doesn’t matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, that’s not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my right arm.
If I hold it for a day, you’ll have to call an ambulance. In each case it’s the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.”
She continued, “And that’s the way it is with stress. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won’t be able to carry on.”
”As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again. When we’re refreshed, we can carry on with the burden – holding stress longer and better each time practiced. So, as early in the evening as you can, put all your burdens down. Don’t carry them through the evening and into the night. Pick them up tomorrow.
Yesterday was Valentine’s Day! It was a time of reflection for me of the great love I’ve been blessed with. God has surrounded my life with love. Sometimes when I’m struggling with an issue or a person I love, I tend to forget how much love is poured into my life through other sources. I have been blessed! Today provides the opportunity to be grateful for each of these people. You know who you are – and thank you!
My husband surprised me with a lovely bracelet made by a local artist for my birthday. Meeting the artist was part of the surprise. She studied under her father and eventually took over his business. He established himself many years ago making jewelry. All pieces are totally handmade sporting a silver aspen leaf. Most well-known are the belt buckles. Each leaf is hand cut, engraved, and shaped. As special as the bracelet is, she said something that has not left my mind. When she creates a piece of art, it is not complete until it is worn. Each piece of jewelry tells the life story of the person wearing it. That means scratches or worn marks carry the history of the person who wore it.
How unlike my experience with other pieces of jewelry! I’ve had jewelers tell me if I bring a piece into them, they can buff any scratches out. I also frequently thought when a piece shows wear or scratches, it is no longer perfect.
I love this introduction to thinking that life is reflected in the seemingly imperfections caused by time and wear.
How true that is of us also. None of us are perfect though many spend time, effort and money to appear so. The reality is life leaves its mark on us. Some of those marks may be nothing more than laugh lines as we age. Or they may be more serious scars resulting from accidents or medical care. Some of the marks left on our life are not visible on the surface. It does not matter what they are, they are the marks of the life lived. This has left me wondering what kind of marks I’m leaving behind.
The holiday season is winding down. If you’re like me, you’ve enjoyed the season. For me it is the holiday lights, the Christmas story, the music of the season and time spent with family and friends. The past year is coming to a close, and the new-year is almost upon us.
How’s your year ending? I’ve looked back on the past year and was amazed at the number of people I connected with, shared experiences with where we built memories together. I recognize I’m adapting to life in a new environment and a different phase of my life. When moving, I took the advice of a dear friend and was cautious about committing to things this first year of my retirement. (Sometimes I wonder if it is really retirement or transition. More on that another time.) The commitments made were to things core to me – a Church small group, a book club, a writers group and a group of friends. I love where we chose to live. I feel more grounded and at peace with myself. I’ve made progress on some of my goals. I’m learning to be more responsive. I’m learning more that God wants me to set goals, but to be flexible and change direction when He guides. I guess I’m learning to dance with Him and let Him lead. What a lesson for a lady who thought she could follow God and still be in control of so much of her own life!
So where does next year go? I don’t know! But I’m open to the adventure, the challenge of growing more, exploring more and learning more about the part of the world where I currently live. I have some goals, but hope to remain flexible enough to change and tweak them as necessary. I desire for my life to make a difference to those I come in contact with. For me, the dance continues.
What do you think your next year will look like and who’s leading it?
Today is a special day in many homes in America, mine included. Be it tradition or faith — this holiday calls me to deeply reflect on what I’m grateful for. As I’ve grown older, learning to live with gratitude and appreciation daily have changed my life. I’ve become a happier, more settled person. I believe that has allowed me to have a positive influence on other’s lives.
Your list of gratitude may be completely different than mine. Yet it is my hope you will have time to reflect on things to be thankful for today and enjoy those around you.
For those interested, here is my partial list: I’m grateful for the life I’ve been given and deeply grateful for the people who are part of my life. I’m grateful for the beauty of the physical world and how varied it is. I’m grateful for the family I grew up in and the things I learned there. Some of those things were not easy, but each has contributed to who I am today. I’m grateful for the children and grandchildren who are part of our family. I’m grateful for the family of faith I can call my own and the love of God so richly bestowed upon us.
This last weekend I attended a Heroine’s Journey writing program. The program is designed for women, to help them identify where they have come from, what they have overcome and who they have become. All the while you accomplish this, you learn skills to improve your writing. It was an amazing, intense and crazy wonderful weekend.
The following is one of the writing prompts used during the weekend. Some of you may already recognize me in some of these chairs and some of you may learn new things about me.
Thank you to all the beautiful ladies who made the weekend so special! You know who you are….
Excuse me! This is my seat.
Excuse me! This is my seat. This seat is reserved for one who has endured hardship inflicted by others and recognized that to stop the abuse, you have to take the control away from the other person. Sometimes that is accomplished by putting space between you and the other person and sometimes it is accomplished when you recognize you only THOUGHT they had control. This person has learned forgiveness, both for themselves and for others.
Excuse me! This is my seat. This seat is for one who has learned you must determine for yourself the things that are important in your life and live for those things. Not to spend your life just collecting things others say are important. This seat is for someone who sees the beauty of the world around them without thinking they have to own it.
Excuse me! This is my seat. This seat is for one who has struggled against the control of others trying to hold them down and recognizes that only happens if you allow it. This seat is for one who has learned that sometimes you have to shut a door to find freedom, and remembers God never closes a door without opening a window.
Excuse me! I believe this is my seat. This seat is for one who has worked for another. Has spent much time and effort developing and creating things for another’s benefit. This person has learned to work with different people in different situations to accomplish the goal or task at hand. This person has learned to plan, both for the benefit of their employer and for themselves. This person can also determine what is important to self.
Excuse me! This is my seat. This is for one who has been given the gift of love and recognizes it is not something that just comes along any day. This person has learned to cherish the gift, accept the freedom and responsibility that comes with receiving and giving this type of love.
Excuse me! I believe this is my seat. This seat is for one who has learned to treat herself with gentleness and forgiveness. One who accepts her weaknesses and knows her strengths. One who knows what things will bring healing to her soul and who wants to help others find that healing also.
Excuse me! This is my seat. I am a woman. That does not mean I know everything, it means I’m okay with me.
Journey to the Heights 